Everyone is always saying that as business owners, we need to ignore the fear we have of trying something new or different. They say that putting ourselves out there is incredibly important for success. And feeling a bit vulnerable is all part of the territory. I know this, because I’m one of the people who is always saying it.
But what happens when we put ourselves out there, allow ourselves to be vulnerable, and the results backfire? People don’t respond the way you’d hoped and it makes you feel all the feels?
You open yourself up and share your opinions, feelings, or point of view and nothing happens? No one responds, no one cares, your business is not in the least bit better off for it. You’re left in this weird emotional place made up of embarrassment and regret with a dash of hurt and pinch of bewilderment.
I think this happens to a lot of us in business.
As new brands, it’s important to experiment with how you connect with your community. You have to try things and see what they respond to. And it’s important to be ok with the fact that you’re not always going to hit the nail on the head, you’re not always going to do, say, or write something that others resonate with.
That’s why I talk about mindset in my free trainings for launching your business and growing your business so much. Doing something and being ok with the potentially disappointing results is all about having a strong mindset.
We have to try things, we have to open up in order to stand out, and we have to find ways to connect with our communities if we really want to build businesses that grow.
We’re allowing people inside our worlds and inside our heads. We’re letting them into the real “behind the scenes” and that’s not easy.
What we can’t do is worry that we’re gonna look or sound silly. It’s inevitable that we’re going to feel that way sometimes but if we let that feeling stop us from being ourselves, then our brands and businesses will ultimately suffer for it.
To not do this is to run the risk of being yet another fashion brand that no one feels connected to, yet another business that has no real people behind it, yet another salesperson doling out the marketing speak. That is not the way to grow a business. That’s not how you’re going to get people to connect with you and your brand. And it’s certainly not how you’re going to build something that transcends trends and economics.
Your job is to build a brand that people feel connected to. You do this by being your imperfect, vulnerable self. You do this by sharing your point of view, even if it’s not the most popular. You do this by using words and phrases that make you, you.
So as you build your business and define your brand, try not to let that voice of doubt in your head win. Create a brand that people care about by opening yourself up and making yourself a little vulnerable.
Putting yourself out there is not easy. Vulnerability is a scary part of business, but honestly, it’s a necessary one. It leads to growth. When you have support from others, people cheering you on, it makes all difference.
Lots of love and encouragement,
Much props to you for being honest Nicole. Everything you said here is true. I just want you to know that as a member of StartUp Fashion, I love what you do and what you stand for. I don’t always say it but I want you to know it anyway. We get so caught up in our day to day lives and business objectives we sometimes forget to show our appreciation. I appreciate you and all you do to help brands like Al Shams move forward.
Thank you for sharing yourself with all of us. Much Love Babes!
Oh, thank you so much, Kim. 🙂
BRAVO, Nicole! Much kudos to you for “putting yourself” out there with heart and conviction! This posting has actually reassured me that I, too, will be “ok” and now I’m ready to start that blog and share my experiences of ups and downs in my start-up business and NOT be afraid anymore to do so! Thank you for opening up and sharing. I’m inspired!:)
I’m so happy to hear that, Chris!
Thank you for this article .. what an enlightenment you gave to me, I always believe about being true to yourself and being open .. but most of time i get those akward moments you describe, so i thought maybe i have to stop doing that.. but here you are coming as a sign .. confirming that it sometimes worth it 🙂
Thank you soooooooooooo much for being open with us , God bless you 🙂
Thank you for your lovely comment, Shaimaa. 🙂
Thank you for this reflection. I’m currently in the middle of creating the products for my brand and felt kind of lost at one point because I was not opening myself up to become my brand and embrace this venture as I should. I realized that this came from the fear that expressing myself as part of my brand might make me vulnerable and affect me later on if things don’t turn out the way I want them to.
Yet, I realized that the only way to make it work it’s if I really embody and feel my brand the way I want my customers to. There’s nothing more magnetic than someone who speaks and acts upon what they love. Restraining myself from doing so could really affect this wonderful venture. If I allow myself to connect with my brand, I will then be able to transmit this to my future customers and creative something more powerful than just a product.
Thank you for your comment, Veronica! I love your point about “more powerful than just a product.”
Hi Nicole, please do not change anything about yourself or what you are doing! I love your style. You have such a nice talent to combine the fashion business know-how, but equally as important, to really tap into the emotional highs and lows of this business. I don’t think there is anyone else out there that offers this. Your posts are spot-on, and I cannot tell you how much I appreciate reading them.
So Nicole, keep on keepin’ on!
Hey Nicole, I really appreciate you opening up and being honest. Your vulnerability made me realize I’m not the only one trying to figure out this Design Game and your blogs for me has been really encouraging.
Thanks Cleah! So go you found it helpful. 🙂
Nicole I loved the article you wrote, thank you for putting yourself out there.
I have felt this also for a long time and I’m not quite sure what to do with that feeling. It would be easier to stay stagnant and not push myself forward because then I won’t be vulnerable to everyone’s judgement, but I know I won’t be happy in myself of I don’t. I’m at the brink of putting myself out there with my business but I’m quite nervous about everyone’s opinions.
Thank you, Lisa. Feeling nervous is expected. It may seem like those who are successful don’t have a doubt in the world, but I promise you they did and at times they still do! The hardest step is the first one. Over time, it gets easier to be much more confident in what you’re putting out there and much less worried about others’ judgment.
Hi Nicole, I really feel your pain. Apologies for not commenting on your last page. I read what you said at the time and thought you were so brave actually. You see, I am struggling with where to go from here. I am
Fashion textile artist trying to break into the fashion world as a business. I am starting to think I may have made a huge mistake. Still finding my way. Not achieving my dream yet. So confused and I know that your sight has been such a wonderful salve my jangled mind. So if it helps, please know you struck a cord and you should not feel down about the response. I went away and thought on your comments, turned them over and over in my mind and was trully grateful you put into words what perhaps so many of us actually do feel and think. Keep on being you and being so courageous.
What a thoughtful and sweet comment, Miriam. Thank you.
Why do you feel like you’ve made a huge mistake? Where are you in the business stage? What’s holding you back from moving forward?
How are you? Thank you for your reply and concern. I had to think a lot through since putting my ‘mistake doubts’ out there.
I am trying to go from being a textile artist to a relevant ethical producer of slow designed one of ‘art fashion garments’ and strugglhmng sourcing as well as juggling family and life commitments. Just rethinking my timing as still have carer commitments on the home front. So just second guessing my overall commitment load
The business plan as such has been tossed as it all just a little intense at the present
Thank you again for your concern,
Thank you for your genuine cocern and care. I have to think about how to reply to your query. I did reply earlier but I am not sure if it actually sent. So again… I have tried to
make my textile art into ‘ a one off’ slow designed textile fashion business. However due to family, carer and life commitments I think I have be too early with my timing.
This has caused me a lot of soul searching and I now have to consider my options.
I have completely abandoned any business plan and am in a contemplative space.
Once again, thanks for asking. I appreciate all your encouragement.
I am having issues with my technology. Hopefully this time this will post.
Thank you for your kind, genuine concern. To answer your query, I have done some serious soul searching.
I may have started my whole business idea just too early for where my family and commitments are currently at.
Putting it plainly, it’s been too much too soon and I have taken a good contemplative look at the whole situation and realise I possibly need to take action and gracefully withdraw, if just for now.
Thank you again, please just keep being your honest kind and genuine self. Your sight is so encouraging.
Nicole, thank you for sharing this! I have had this experience many times. With words and with work, and its nice to know i’m not alone. It definitely teaches us to be stronger and tougher. And more open to sharing even more things, and the deeper you go the more your brand represent you, I guess 🙂
Thanks for your comment, Hind! I think we all have to decide individually where we draw the line on our privacy. Then from there, allow ourselves to be open and honest and transparent.